[创作] I want to be your knight Klaudia PTT批踢踢实业坊

[创作] I want to be your knight

楼主: Klaudia (天佑台湾) 2013-07-14 14:17:41

I want to be your Knight,
and always guard you whenever day and night.
You are always right,
just like the sun and moon bring us in the light.
You are so shining and elegant that I can not move my sight.
And I wish you always sleep tight.

楼主: Klaudia (天佑台湾) 2013-07-14 14:18:00

用了好多次Always,不知道该怎么办?

作者: korn31910 (ç¾…æ‹”) 2013-07-14 17:33:00

或可用同义字或去掉非必要的always

作者: spacedunce5 (è®€ä¸å®Œçš„æ›¸) 2013-07-15 15:37:00

always 的重复有独特的韵味，倒是韵脚可以更多元

楼主: Klaudia (天佑台湾) 2013-07-15 20:26:00

好，我会试试

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