※ 引述《maydayjing (仲夏夜之星)》之铭言：
: 女孩版好，同篇文章有发到英文版
: 但希望板上有英文很强的人也可以指点，感激不尽
: 撰写自己的活动经历，是要给美国人看的，很怕自己的文法太糟
: 我开头用 现在完成式 表示我有这个经验
: 然后叙述我这个活动做了什么的时候我用 过去式
: 最后我表达要完成这件事需要怎样的能力
: 我不知道要用 现在式 还是过去式耶？
: 因为能力应该是常态（不会因为时间而变）所以想说是用现在式
: 但整篇前面又是过去式
: 发现这个问题好基本......
: 高中考大学时忘了是怎么解决的QQ
: 请教各位了，感谢
: 以下附上我的文章，如果有网友有空愿意帮我纠正文法也非常感谢 ＞ ＜
: （一）
: I have a great passion for Mysticism, especially TAROT Divination. I have
tarot请用小写，全大写看起来很痛苦也不正确。D改小写。
: served as a leader of Astrology Club in my college for three semesters.
^
用 the 不要用 a，astro club不要大写，前面也加一个the。
: During that period, I planned two big activities for all students and people
: outside the campus. The activities were very successful, and many people came
: to join us. Apart from being the sponsor, I also worked as a cashier and
你是赞助商? 不是的话sponsor这个字换一下吧。
: answered questions from our customers. Customers paid money to me so that
删掉to me跟that
: they can buy our service—TAROT. To do well on the TAROT divination, the most
tarot不要大写。还有这个句点跟下一句的中间感觉少掉很多故事，可以多写一点东西
接起来
: important thing is being willing and eager to help people. Besides, it takes
: much patience for listening to the stories and giving response. As a result,
^
从这开始，改成to listen to the stories，response换成feedbacks会好很多。
复数很重要，因为你很多地方都有忘记，只是我懒得每个都抓。
这边的as a result用的有点莫名其妙，用些别的衔接词吧!
: communication skill is essential as well.
skills are比较好。
: 要用 planned (过去计画了) 还是 have planned (曾经计画了) 呢？
: 后面三个 is , takes , is 因为这是不变的道理，并不是只有在活动中需要
: 所以我用现在式，但是整篇文是过去式？
: （二）
: I have applied a project called “Buddy Program” when I was a freshman. This
^
请爱用to，改成applied to a project。
: program was held by Office of International Cooperation in my college and the
^
加个the。
: target of it was offering assistance to exchange students which were called
不要用the target of it这种落落长又念的满嘴泡的词，请用the purpose。
后面也请改成动词，用名词怪怪的。was to offer assiatance。
which请改成who，学生们不是物品。
: Buddy. We helped our Buddies accommodate themselves to the new surroundings.
: From this program, I established the international view of different cultures
改成I have established an international view。
International view不是特定的东西，不要用the。
: and made friends with some American.
sssssssssssssssssss
: 因为这个计画是每个学期都有的，并不是只有过去才被举办
: 所以我在想是不是应该要用 is held？
不用，你参加的是过去的。
: 同理，活动的目标是帮助外籍学生，也是常态，要用 is offering 吗？
: 最后，我从这个计划建立了国际观以及与美国人做朋友，应该是要用过去式对吧？
: （三）
: As a student in my college, I also participated in some activities of the
in my college删掉，没有啥特殊意义念起来很难听。
请用I have also participated。
: voluntary service club. We had camps at some elementary schools every winter a
some删掉听起来才不会怪怪的。
: nd summer vacation.When having events, solving sudden cries was inevitable. Therefore, I
这第一个句点后面感觉也少掉一大段故事，跟下一句很难接在一起。
sudden cries是突然的哭声吗? 还是sudden crises?
was改成is。
: developed strong management skills during my service in the club and was able
请用I have developed。
: to deal with the problems in a timely manner.
请不要用the。
: 每年寒暑假都会举办营队，是不是应该用 have？
: 然后解决问题也是常态的，并不是只有之前举办才有，所以要用 was 还是 is 呢？
: 最后的栋词我就没用黄色框了，应该是过去式吧＠＠？
: （四）
: I have joined a Student Fellowship Club in my college life and the members of
joined the Student...。
in my college life听起来很不自然，in my college就好了。
: this club are all from my country－Keelung. One of the activities I have held
基隆不是国家，请不要用country，请用hometown或是home city。
这里把have删掉。
: was selling some specialties of my city to all students and people outside
some删掉，听起来很不正式。
of改成from好很多很多。
: the campus. From this activity, I made a chance to introduce our country to
前面都用I现在突然跑出一个our很怪，还有country也改掉。
: my classmates and let them have a taste of our foods.
let them听起来好像是你准许他们吃这些食物一样，请用比较委婉一点的方式。
: 黄色的是我不知道时态对不对的地方
: 如果有网友愿意帮我看整个文法真的感激不尽 ＞ ＜
唉，工具人的天性真悲哀orz。
你还是花钱比较好，整篇扫一遍比较安全。