承之前文章，常常看到同学写作发展方向重点放错，今天再来看两个实例！
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Most advertisements make products seem much better than they really are.
Agree.
First of all, making the product seem much better means that making the
product to look more appealing, and advertisements do make the product look
more attractive. For example, there is a mop that has been on the market for
decades, but because of no advertisement, people did not know about this mop.
However, after the mop company started to put high quality advertisements on
magazines and other media, people started to buy this mop because the mop
look fashionable on the advertisement. Therefore, although the mop hasn’t
been renovated, the advertisement made the mop seem much better than they
really are.
同学可以先想一下，主题句结束后，例子发展有呼应到的有哪些字？先想一下再往下看。
——————————————————————————————
应该有发现到，针对”look more appealing”这个主题句的论点，有呼应到的地方，只
有两个字：look fashionable, 这样发展显然是不够的。
建议至少再加两句话发展，例如：
When they started to air commercials where people use their mop in a big
fancy house, customers would think it looks really nice and would consider
getting one in their place too. They may only realize that the mop looks good
only because the house in the commercial was well-designed and decorated to
match the mop until they get the product.
在看另外一个例子。
Which is beneficial for young students (14-18y) to do in their spare time?
a. Working and gaining practical experience such as volunteer or part-time job
b. Learning sports
c. Learning a musical instrument
同学立场：Learning sports
First of all, young students can make friends through learning sports. For
instance, swimming includes four poses, freestyle, breaststroke, backstroke,
and butterfly stroke, respectively, and if students want to swim quickly,
they need to improve their posture to the standard. Students can hire a
coach, watch online videos, or ask other people for help. Through this
process, students can make friends more easily because they have common
topics to talk about and can also discuss sports competitions to improve
themselves. Accordingly, learning sports can make friends.
一样先想一下，有呼应到交朋友这件事的，有哪几个部分？
Through this process, students can make friends more easily because they have
common topics to talk about 只有这里，而且common topics就带过去，也没发展到。
回到主题句，想一下要如何发展can make friends through learning sports?
可能方向如下：
借由学游泳这件事情，如果碰到一样也喜欢游泳的人，很自然的会聊起游泳相关的事，包
含平常如何练习？怎么让自己进步？有什么不错的影片或网红？很自然的就会有共同的话
题，甚至可能会一起约出来游泳，帮对方看看有什么地方可以进步，会变成好朋友。
所以游泳包含自由式、蛙式，除非是要写更长的文章，不然在这种3, 400字的文章里面，
根本不重要，建议不写，赶快发展“交朋友”这件事。
希望借由以上这两个例子，同学更能抓到文章该铺陈、发展的方向。
Till next time,
J2
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8/18(四)下半年机经趋势公开课，仅此一梯：
http://j2toefl.blogspot.com/p/blog-page_17.html
8/20 (六) 实力双讲座：托福背景知识＋口说特训公开课
https://forms.gle/fudzcwvKrNmF9CdX9