“蓝色周一”MBA生涯公益解惑:Goal Essay疑问

楼主: airturtle23 (三只小猪)   2023-11-01 20:58:52
“Monday Blue Buster 蓝色周一症候群破解”MBA生涯公益解惑日:Career Goal Essay
疑问
(由于具体案例多在对岸论坛网,故以现成案例分析。)
Q:
大家看看我的Goal 是否有大漏洞:
I have a long term plan to build up my own software company in IT industry.
China has so many talents of software engineering, but China dose not own
world famous software companies. While, India’s software industry have
boomed up and cultivated many well-known native software firms, such as
InfoSys and Satyam. On the other side, foreign software and solution
companies, such as SAP, Oracle and Microsoft ,almost occupied China’s
software industry. Ironically, they hosted their R&D centers in China and
hired a bunch of Chinese engineers. I aspire to take the responsibility to
alter the situation and foster a world-class software service provider from
China.
For this goal, first of all, I should build and sharpen my business
capabilities before 35 years old. In Intel, I inspired my potential and
learned a lot about various leadership styles, effective team work, customer
orientation, and business operation. Especially, Intel’s open and global
working environment cultivated me to be a pro-active and initiative guy with
global thinking. However, only a MBA program can offer me systematic business
management trainings to improve my general skill-sets of international
business operation. Secondly, I need a business co-partner, who are smart and
passion. In a top MBA school, it will be easy to get this task done. Thirdly,
I should find out the venture capital to support the setup of my business. So
I prefer study in US for my MBA program, where it is relatively easier to get
capital support.
A:
根据笔者曾成功协助个案录取哈佛MBA、拿下耶鲁MBA奖学金,
及曾创下全年度所有个案以GMAT均分650、无接班无弱势的凡人条件,拿下包含Top 20
MBA奖学金等前30名校录取信的经验,
以及曾成功协助众多无身份、无背景、非学霸的个案拿下Apple、Google、Amazon、
Facebook、McKinsey、Microsoft等各大企业巨头面试,
并进入美国顶尖企业:如Google、Amazon、NIKE、SAP、eBay、Expedia、DuPont...等企
业任职的经验,
这篇essay除了不知为何要从硬件转软件之外,大问题不是太严重,但有很多细部问题,
不解决是不会录取的。
语气平铺直叙,没有看到什么热情所在。
不过国际坊间交战守则中的sample很多也都是这样的语气。
长程目标有大方向,但方向有点太大了。
讲到大陆与印度趋势都很好。
不过以上状况都无关紧要。
主要问题有几大点:
一是大陆与印度有这些趋势,但只是总体经济面。
跟您个人生涯的关系为何?
要有细部的个人动机结合。
二是为什么这样的趋势要由你来执行这样的目标?
有什么个人能力或特别经历与其他竞争者区隔?
为什么十几亿人要由你来执行,而不是别人?
你跟别人有什么不同?
这篇essay主要问题就是:几乎可以套在其他十亿人身上,没有很强的个人独特性与区隔

三是没有明确的细部目标与具体实践方式。
内容讲的方向很大,有什么细部目标与计画,能一步一步将大方向目标完成? 必须要有
break down细目,以及动机目标,跟你的独特关系。
四是定义模糊。
software太多了,要讲出是哪种software,然后为什么是这种software?
市场在哪?为什么会有这市场? 可能因为某某趋势或市场需求~
您的公司要多大规模?资金来源为何?为什么非得这样做不可?当前业界状况如何?你所
看到的愿景又是如何?为什么你觉得这种愿景会实现?...等等
这些基础条件要先定义好之后,跟您现在的能力与资源有何差异?
找出中间的gap以后,才会具体知道需要加强哪些部分:
是需要marketing? 还是需要finance? 还是需要entrepreneurship?
必须要把这些细目都定义清楚,才会发现是否欠缺MBA讯练。
而需要的是MBA的哪些部份?又为什么是UNC?非UNC不可?
UNC强项并不在entrepreneurship,而是在marketing communication,而且非常强。
但跟你的目标与现状,都还没有任何证据能够结合。
必须要将这些证据明确列出,才会有面试机会,并且进而录取,甚至拿奖。
第五是对生涯未来有默认前提。
为什么会出现一个转折点在35岁?而不是33岁或38岁?
需要有个理由或证据,不能无中生有。
然后回到定义模糊的问题。
你所指的business capability是哪些?要有明细。
你可以说需要有managing people and leadership,能够带领企业团队。
那么你目前的管理能力已经具备什么规模?是哪方面?
是vision?还是managerial economics?strategic planning?quantitative analysis
?还是motivation skills?还是coordination skills?delegation?还是pitching
and fundraising skills?还是project management?reward management?还是
empathetic leadership?
还是哪个具象的领导力面向?
为什么会需要这些领导面向?跟生涯目标有什么关系?又跟学校有什么关系?
为什么非你不可?
例如:要有international economics、marketing research及consumer behavior能力,
才能知道市场在哪;
要有financial accounting与corporate finance,及investment management,才能知道
如何企业筹资;
有innovation management、IT product development and project management,甚至还
要pricing、channel management、managerial accounting、international product
marketing,才能知道如何开发新软件产品,成本为何?定价为何?通路为何?以及如何
行销...等。
您下头讲到的这段就相当接近:
In Intel, I inspired my potential and learned a lot about various leadership
styles, effective team work, customer orientation, and business operation.
Especially, Intel’s open and global working environment cultivated me to be
a pro-active and initiative guy with global thinking.
不过没讲完,要再往下延伸。
例如:要把customer orientation定义更精细完整。
customer orientation的目的是为了satisfy particular demands,并且capitalize
feasible profit。
然后跟学校课程结合:所以你需要UNC的consumer behavior course,来知道消费者到底
在想什么?
以及 market research来找出市场需求...等。
后面这段有点抽象 :
Especially, Intel’s open and global working environment cultivated me to be
a pro-active and initiative guy with global thinking. However, only a MBA
program can offer me systematic business management trainings to improve my
general skill-sets of international business operation.
不太知道你的pro-active and initiative定义是什么?为什么会需要这些特质?
又为什么这会需要MBA训练?
可以换一种更具体的讲法,例如 :
Grown from a public servant family that nurtured me with bureaucratic
parenting treatment, I’ve developed superior rationale to not only defend my
freedom against such arbitrary parenting treatment, but also made me capable
of building large-scale, million-layer structured logic framework to
substantially boost CPU efficiency by 8.7%, while reducing thermal redundancy
by 6.3%. As I’m the first person in the big family to graduate from college,
I aim to achieve greater impact to honor my family, and I plan to expand my
impact from CPU to related softwares, so as to achieve better
software-hardware integration. As Steve Jobs once said, “If you want to
build your own software you must build your own Hardware.”
I hence need Hass’ signature Applied Innovation courses, including
International Business Development (IBD), Design Sprint for Corporate
Innovation, and Design, Evaluate and Scale Development Technologies to equip
me how to assess international user behavior, and develop user-centered
programs...
这些Essay并不只是在写什么故事,而是你的真实人生使命,并且能够实际与MBA课程结合
,才能将使命与管理工具结合,发挥到极致,而使产业乌托邦能够实现。
不然即使念完名校,也没办法派上用场。
最后一点是外求于人。
找co-partner没问题,但是这个人似乎比你的能力更为强大?
若是这样,你本身的价值将会相对降低。
又这样的co-partner如果真的要这样找,何不直接飞到学校附近旅行几天,到学校酒吧喝
几杯,交交朋友就行了。
不需要念个MBA这么大投资。
简单讲是需要具体细项目标与执行方式,并跟个人独特性与生涯方向结合;
再解释学校的细项特性来做结合。
这样才能超越学校,让学校来追你。
Sincerely,
David Lee
原文出自:
https://mbacareerfitter.blogspot.com/2023/11/monday-blue-buster-mbacareer-goal-essay.html

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